An Amish, a Handlebar, and a Selleck Walk Into A Bar...

Well, well, well....

It seems as though the pressure might be getting to some Mantasticles. As those of you who work here know, the Roto department is a little...funky. We're crammed into what is essentially an attic, with air that doesn't move, and temperatures that regularly soar into the upper reaches of the 70s and sometimes the 80s. (Do you think I'm joking? Stop by today around 5 PM and see how long you last.) Add to that the fact that five out of the eight employees are deeply involved in Mantastic 2006 and you've got a situation that's bristling with torque. Two handlebars, a muttonchop, a Selleck and an Amish. The three who aren't involved are a girl, the boss, and an Asian, so we've pretty much got everyone possible involved.

This morning came just like the others, it seemed. It was getting sultry up here, I was listening to 70's porno music, Kane was working on his staying-awake skills and plotting world overthrow while wearing his Amish hat, and Brian was shouting "Gay club!" at random intervals whilst wearing mirrored Aviators. I got up to stretch my legs and noticed that there were two pieces left from the cake I baked last night (??!?!?!?!!). Rarely do baked goods last to 9:45 in this department as we're a pretty ravenous bunch and the jackals from the neighboring department usually clean out the scraps toot quick. The following is a nearly verbatim transcript of the ensuing dialog:

Rally Chimp: "What the F? There's cake left?"
Brian: "Dude, I had two pieces!"
Rally Chimp: "What about Kane?"
Brian: "Kane have you had your vitamin Cake yet?"
Kane: "No."

Kane swiveled his chair and dutifully got up to eat a piece of cake, as if it was some sort of mandate from our newly fascist government. I then proceeded down to the bathroom to get some fresh air and take the biggest dump of the week.

Have you ever heard of those experiments where they isolate people and after a short while they lose their ability to reason and use common sense? The book Lord of the Flies would be an example, except that it was fiction, but you get the idea. Imagine Lord of the Flies, except that the kids all had to grow beards. You think that might be going on here?

I will now douse myself in lamp oil.